How to Win Friends?

All of you have probably read or heard about this famous book “How to Win Friends and Influence People” from the famous Author “Dale Carnegie”. As the name depicts, it is clear that this book is all about winning hearts of people by listening to them, asking them and show your interest in them. So, I read his first chapter named as “Do This And You’ll be Welcome Anywhere”. Before reading this, I literally had no idea that what is the difference between being interesting vs. interested. I know most of you also have no idea about this but I will make it clear to all of you by giving some suitable examples.

Let’s suppose, you went for an interview and you are just talking about yourself that I am a good public speaker, I have leadership and management skills. I can do this and that etc and said nothing about the company. Believe me Interviewer has no interest in listening to your hobbies and skills. He wanted to know how much you are passionate about this company, how much you are interested in this company and the job you are applying for. You can only prove this by doing a great research on the history, background, products and services of that company. So this is the difference between interesting and interested. Show others that you are interested in them rather than just talking about yourself.

I have also given an activity named as “The Interested Challenge”. This challenge is actually really interesting because in this I am not going to talk about myself, I am going to ask people about them, about their routine, their future plans and a little bit about what they are doing now a days. So, I started the challenge and continued this for 24 hours to get their responses. I literally talked to 5-6 person including my friends and family members. I asked few simple questions like, “How are you?”, “What are you doing these days”; “You want to do a Master’s degree or a job after graduation,” etc. The one thing I learned after this activity is that being interested is much better than being interesting. I really enjoyed talking people about themselves and they are replying me even faster than before because they are also enjoying that I am showing my interest in their lives. Few of my friends were like, “Rida is everything OK? Why are you asking?” and I was like, “Yes, I just wanted to know what’s going on in your life.” From this activity, I realised that this is too important for us to show interest in someone’s life and the book that I have mentioned above, gave me a great lesson that people only welcome those who knows how to win their hearts by showing interest in their lives. By reading the first chapter of this book, I came to know that the simplest and quickest way to become an interesting person is to show interest in others. So from now, all of you make a little promise to yourself that you will focus on being interested than being interesting because Dale Carnegie told us a simple formula of winning hearts and influence people. Just try to give genuine compliments on a daily basis like Nice to meet you, that’s so sweet of you, I encourage you, I appreciate you etc. Make them feel special; make them feel that you are actually interested in them. Last but not the least; I wanted to share a beautiful quote by Dale Carnegie:

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